Pat Robertson, you have a message…it’s from Timbuktu. Some Islamic rebel says you’d love it there. Hold on…okay, he says you would love it there but only for a moment, because they’d have to kill you as an infidel. Th— wait a sec, Pat…okay, but you can kill them as infidels in your own country. Hold on, you talk to him. You two have everything in common.

Well, fellows, thanks for the warning about Sharia law. Methinks I’ll turn around….